I don’t have any funny stories or anything today. I just want to tell you how wonderful my God is. He has been waking my heart up in such a new way. There aren’t words that are big enough to tell you how much I love him or even approach how much he loves me (and you). His gentleness and kindness have just been so apparent to me these last weeks. I’m not living perfectly in response, or anything, but he is growing my faith and hope in leaps and bounds. Pray that I would continue to walk with him. This little bit was in a bible study I was doing this morning: “We tend to run to God for temporary relief. God is looking for people who will walk with Him in steadfast belief.” That was so striking to me, as I’ve been the former for so many years. But I desire so deeply to walk with him in steadfast belief. Pray that I could continue to walk there.
I’ll write more newsy stuff soon. I just had to tell you…
We spent the weekend with Ange’s parents in Kokomo and then headed east to Gas City, IN where we lead worship at Exit 59 Church. We love it any time we get to go to Exit 59, because they’re such a warm, tender church and their pastor, Darren Campbell is someone I look up to quite a bit. I’ve never been in front of a church that sang so LOUD either. It was awesome and joyful.
The reason we wanted to go spend time with them is that they’ve decided to “adopt us” as we head out to Northern Ireland in a lot of practical and personal ways. It’s a scary thing to uproot your life and move it oversees, so it feels good to have a group of people on this side of the pond who are praying for us and interested in what God is doing through us. That’s as important as our part, I think.
Another really meaningful thing is that during the service, Darren and Nancy washed our feet as a symbolic gesture of service towards us and the people of Northern Ireland. Part of why this was so meaningful is that we believe “foot washing” (not literally, but in the sense of sacrificial, no-strings-attached service) is a big part of our calling. I want to post more about that later, but in the mean time, suffice it to say that we felt loved by Exit 59 and loved by our Lord, who gently speaks in a thousand ways.
Thanks so much, guys. We love you.
I was spending to time with the Lord tonight and I found this video of one of my favorite songs:
This is reality: He loves us!
I know some of you automatically thought, “yeah – a post on chocolate”. Not today. Sorry.
Yesterday Mark and I and a bunch of friends went to a baby shower for a close friend who just lost her father. It was the most beautiful of days. Low humidity, lots of sun and a gentle breeze. Mitchy got showered with lots of beautiful handmade gifts as well as the necessary goodies that will make life so much easier in the coming months. It was like a reunion for lots of us who are close in heart but rarely are in the same location. The shower was followed by a cookout on a big country estate right by a river. We ate beautifully charred brats and burgers, walked the land, enjoyed each other. We made a campfire and kept warm outside after the stars made their appearance.
We watched a slideshow about Mitchy’s dad and we cried. Some people didn’t seem really affected, I suppose because they didn’t know him. (And for some reason, it feels awkward to cry about a loss that you aren’t connected to by blood or personal kinship.) But I cried. And I’d only met him a few times. There’s something that happens to my heart when people who are loved and respected are remembered and honored. It always makes my heart feel like it’s going to explode. I had to leave the crowd of people and sit looking at the river for a while after watching the video. I felt inspired to tell God that I still trusted Him and I listed off all the things I love that I proceeded to give to Him. I know it’s quoted a lot, but I still love the line in The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe by C.S. Lewis that says, “He’s not safe, but he’s good”. That feels so true about God. He’s made no promise to me that Mark will live longer than me, or that my family will be on earth as long as I’d like. I don’t know that I’ll always have fingers to play the piano or a voice to sing or even my mind to think clearly with. But He does promise me that He’ll make EVERYthing into a beautifully woven story that tells something and is something beautiful. And He will always be with me and He will always be enough. It’s easier to say when it’s not my father or husband that I’m mourning. But I consider this training. I’m building a history of trust with my God. And when it comes time, I hope I can still say, “I hurt, but I trust you”.
Thank you Mitchy and Nancy for sharing your grief with me and allowing my heart to expand with it. I hope it can comfort and cover your hearts, too.
Mark and I had the pleasure of attending a bit of the District Conference of the C&MA this past Tuesday. It was a really interesting day. It felt really good and encouraging to be with a bunch of people who love the Lord and have walked with him – some for a few years, and some for a great many. We felt really honored to be prayed for by the whole group (a surprise to us) and that our calling stirred up excitement in some of our brothers and sisters (and the President of the denomination!). We even got to lead worship with our Indy pastor, Danny. We got cut short during the actual service, but it was so much fun practicing and worshiping together.
Among all the other encouragement and good discussion-starting interactions, Mark and I were reminded of what’s before us. A friend, Chad, was asking us how we’re praying for what’s before us. And we realized we’d gotten short-sighted enough to be pretty consumed with the Visa coming through to the extent of forgetting the work our hearts need to be getting ready for. Please pray with us that we wouldn’t lose focus and that we’d be productive in preparation for the work to come. It’s so easy to get swept away by the little things that are somewhat out of our hands! Thanks, Chad.
Life does still keep plugging along, of course. The house we’re living on is on the market and had it’s first showing today. We’ve got a slew of baby showers and other random celebrations. Friends getting married. A friend losing a father. Our hearts and being more and more moved with celebration and shared sorrow. Life is good and I’m incredibly thankful for it all. God just continues to blow open my experience of His heart. And still leaves me wanting more…
These lyrics from a Misty Edwards song have been really moving to me this week:
I don’t want to talk about you like you’re not in the room
I want to look right at you
I want to sing right to you
I believe you’re listening
I believe you’re moved at the sound of my voice
Give me Dove’s Eyes
Give me undivided devotion to only you
